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Thursday, 10 November 2011

Review: Voyage to the Prohibited Planet

Posted on 15:52 by Unknown
Voyage to the Prohibited Planet
Thursday 10th November 2011; Theatre In The Mill

Engine Oil. he Tiger, The Wizard and the Closet. Cold Mikado. Alternative titles to musicals that there could be, but it was ‘Voyage to the Prohibited Planet’ that BUSOM – Bradford University Society of Operettas and Musicals - chose as the title of their latest production, a scratch based on the 1980s musical ‘Return to the Forbidden Planet’ which, itself, is based on the 1950s movie ‘Forbidden Planet’ which, just to add another layer of confusion, is based on Shakespeare’s play ‘The Tempest’.

(Though I’m pretty sure there are no aliens with boppers on their heads, robots or 12-foot space creatures in Shakespeare’s play, but please let me know if I’m wrong).

The musical tells the story of a surveying crew of space pilots who, under the command of Captain Tempest, enter a meteor storm and have to land on the planet D’illyria, where they meet Doctor Prospero, a mad scientist, and his daughter and robot, attracted by his promise to fix their ship. Through their encounters on the planet they learn about Doctor Prospero’s mysterious mind-altering ‘X Factor’ formulation and how the science officer is actually his long-lost wife, plus fight against a 12-foot monster that enters through the airlock.

Throughout the dialogue the musical is peppered with 1950s and 1960s rock ‘n’ roll tunes.

So, with a nice pint of real cider in hand, I wandered up into the theatre to witness the BUSOM production, their first since their recent 24-hour show production of ‘Fame’. And whereas that performance was peppered with forgotten lines, missed cues and improvisation – run of the mill when you consider the nature of how long they had to learn the piece and no reflection on how much fun it was to watch – this was a much slicker affair with minimal set – it amounted to nothing more than a dozen chairs, some music stands and a black curtain – but a lot of fun to be had and some impressive sound and lighting effects scattered through it.

The opening of the musical was possible the most unusual that I’d been to with the cast encouraging everyone to put their hands on their head and make raspberry sounds in the style of an aeroplane safety briefing. Nothing like breaking the ice there. And for those of you wondering why, it would be explained later.

It was then onto the main production with James Howe taking the lead role of Captain Tempest, possessing possible the biggest, if you mind the pun, visual joke of the evening, wearing a metallic badge on his jumper that looked like a, er, rocket with two large exhaust bits. If you’ve seen the second Austin Powers film you’ll know what I’m getting at. If you haven’t then you are in possession of a clean mind and I salute you!

His costume was one of a handful of remarkable tops, from the three ‘aliens’ covered in green body paint and boppers to Stuart’s remarkably genuine looking Star Trek top. If I didn’t know better I’d say he had it already in his wardrobe when the musical was planned, but that’s only a guess. But I’m right.

As Captain Tempest James was a well-chosen lead, with a good sense of humour in his acting and a good voice to carry off the tracks, even if he did have to rely on a folder for some lines and music, a technique carried over from the 24-hour show and used by a lot of the cast during the piece, which I wasn’t expecting as they usually are good at being script-less.

His duet on the classic ‘It’s A Man’s, Man’s, Man’s World’ with Anna Garlick as science officer Gloria was both funny and well executed and Anna’s performance throughout the show was a highlight, proving to be an exceptional character actor and very funny visually, whilst also being able to carry off the songs.

It was after this song that the effort put into the effects in the production showed off, with great used of strobe and sound effects to really simulate a ship in distress, and it was always inevitable when casting Daniel Ratcliffe and Stuart Sellens as redshirts, that they’d both get killed throughout the course of the play, with Daniel being the first of several victims to the monster.

As the musical continued on there was one thing that annoyed me about it, and that’s more down to the nature of the musical and the truncated form, rather than BUSOM’S performance of it, but it reminded by of the musical ‘We Will Rock You’ which I had the mixed-pleasure of seeing a while ago, where songs are set-up awkwardly in the script with lines such as ‘We’re going to crash. Great balls of fire!’ being the Forbidden Planet equivalent of ‘To get there, we have to cross the Seven Seas of Rhye – queue song!’. But that’s a bugbear of my own and more, as I say, down to the nature of the play.

This did at least have the improvement over the Queen musical in having a backing chorus of aliens and no bastardised lyrics of ‘Radio Ga Ga’, though some of the songs were tweaked here and there to fit in with the plot.

We now got to the point of the ship crashing on the planet, with Dave Jennings as Prospero once more diving into the deliciously evil role with gusto, managing to keep his performance just on the right side of hamming it up but also being one of the strongest male singers of the evening. Naomi Fowler got to play robot Ariel 5000 – which sounds to me like a really powerful detergent or a futuristic Little Mermaid, but I digress – being intentionally very robotic in her performance and being happy to stand on stage with painted card strapped in front of her and a Chinese take-away container on her head.

(We’ve all been there of course, just not necessarily in front of an audience, just at home after FND).

Rachel Mitchell played Miranda, Prospero’s daughter, reprising her smitten-teenager role from the 24-hour show and being even better at it, being possibly the most enthusiastic and believable character on the stage. I hope to see more of her in future productions as she has really excelled in her two appearances so far.

It was also at this point that Joel Blakemore, the ship’s Shakespeare-spouting chef ‘Cookie’, came into his own, once more proving he’s worth being cast with another hilarious portrayal of a down-on-his-luck character, thoroughly geeking it up with his performance, use of Sonic Screwdriver, and ability to collapse on stage.

The chorus of ‘Good Vibrations’ was well done and timed well and Joel’s solo of ‘I’m Not Going To Wash For A Week’, backed by the alien chorus of Lyndsey Niven, Emelie Ollila and Poppy Brooks, was a joy to listen to, Joel doing an excellent job in an area he has struggled at times before.

The show was also punctuated by some excellent background acting from the cast, reacting to other characters and songs such as during ‘I Heard It Through The Grapevine’, a very good performance by Lyndsey, Emilie and Poppy, whose vocals were thankfully not as blotchy as their green make-up.

Having Bill Harding on piano – doing a stirling job on tracks of mixed tempos – really benefited this production over the PA songs of the 24-hour show, not drowning out the singing of the solos.

Rachel Mitchell was back up next, performing a fantastic version of ‘Teenager In Love’, again cementing herself as an asset to the group, the track beautifully sung and acted with passion, though perhaps needing a little bit more volume against the piano.

Joel and Rachel continued to put in great performances, alongside James as the vain Captain, James pulling off his personality well through creative use of props and his hair, which itself almost deserves a credit for its performance, who shone in his version of ‘Young Girl’, even if his moving back and forth across the stage was a little monotonous. Rachel, however, added to the track by some cracking acting as the song continued, clearly getting sadder as she realised her feelings for the captain were not reciprocated.

Next was the welcome return of Anna as Gloria the scientist, dragged back on stage for some more comic acting before we were treated to another enthusiastic and dramatic performance by Dave Jennings, with a catchy adapted version of the Elvis classic ‘All Shook Up’.

But, as the monster burst through the air lock once more, we got a freeze frame from the cast and a funny dramatic summing up from Sara Pietrzik as the narrator, before the interval arrived. Though, even after most of the cast left the stage in the blackout, Dave remained in character on the floor, but luckily he did break out whilst we were downstairs so he didn’t have to lie down for twenty minutes.

After a quick blast of fresh air it was back into the theatre for the second part with the cast back in their freeze frame positions, and some well-timed sound effects as Stuart shot the creature but ultimately met his maker. A green light was used to simulated Gloria’s imprisonment in jail and the second Elvis track of ‘Jailhouse Rock’ re-inforced it, a well performed by the cast, especially considering the tricky dance moves which, for the most part, were performed successfully. The song also got the audience happily clapping along.

The performance of the ‘Shoop, Shoop Song’ that followed by the aliens was almost perfect compared to the original and Rachel continued to shine as Miranda, now in a weird wig, and treating us to track ‘Robot Man’ and excelling at it. Plus, it was a good excuse for the cast to burst into doing an adaptation of the Macarena behind her, which Stuart knew he couldn’t miss out on, returning to the stage back from the head but now with a Red Dwarf-inspired hologram H on his forehead.

The plot of the musical continued with a nod to the X Factor reality show – in this case the X Factor formula seemingly kills the robot rather than releasing eight years of tosh into the charts – and the destruction of the monster, before the audience are encouraged to help ‘reverse the polarity flow’ (you know what, I don’t think that’s real science) by repeating the movements from the very early introduction, much to the embarrassment, I might add, of me and my friends!

It turned out in the plot that the X Factor has made Ariel 5000 human, allowing Naomi Fowler to emerge from the restrictions of playing a robot and putting in some great, hilarious acting contributions to the end, bouncing well off Joel as an interesting pair.

At this point it’s also worth noting some other great performances on the night. Sara Pietrzik as the narrator only had a few solo lines other than chorus work but delivered them with comic relish; Joseph Page as a member of the crew was possibly the most enthusiastic member of the crew, especially during ‘Born To Be Wild’ where, between him and David Collinson, the lyrics were brought to life in funny fashion from every wild arm gesture and on-stage hug; plus ‘Andrzej Frelek’ who bounced off the other people on stage in a good role.

Jon Carter and Nartani Nithianandasivam were also integral parts of the cast as well, but I would have liked to have seen more from them.

With the musical coming to a close there was just time for Dave Jennings to deliver a cracking version of the ‘Monster Mash’ before the cast launched into a spirited version of ‘I Lost My Heart To A Starship Trooper’.

Overall it was another excellent production from BUSOM, with standout performances from Anna Garlick, Rachel Mitchell, Dave Jennings, and Joel Blakemore; four fine comic and well-acted performances, complimented by great turns from James Howe, Naomi Fowler and the rest of the cast, and powerful singing from the trio of aliens.

If there was one criticism I would have is that the performance only came to about fifty-five minutes sans interval and was I hoping for a longer show, but what we did got was well acted, funny and full of great, singable songs, delivered well by an enthusiastic cast, complimented by some excellent piano, sound effects and lighting tricks.

With maybe fewer obvious scripts to rely on and a bit more material it would have been a practically flawless production but, as always, going to see a performance by BUSOM is not a disappointment, and I look forward once more to their next production, ‘Around The World In 80 Minutes’, just in time for Christmas.

[7.5 / 10]

Cast:

Captain Tempest – James Howe
Gloria – Anna Garlick
Miranda – Rachel Mitchell
Prospero – Dave Jennings
Ariel 5000 – Naomi Fowler
Cookie – Joel Blakemore
Boson – Andrzej Frelek
Steward – Emily Bennett
Narrator – Sara Pietrzik
Crewman – Joseph Page
Aliens – Poppy Brooks, Lyndsey Niven, Emelie Ollila
Redshirts – Daniel Ratcliffe, Stuart Sellens
Chorus – Jon Carter, David Collinson, Nartani Nithianandasivam
Directors – Christine Brighouse-Johnson, Bill Harding, Zoe Howe
Piano Man – Bill Harding
Crew – Mike Bedford, Nicki Bedford, Kate Concannon
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Sunday, 6 November 2011

The Shepley Lion: News in the Roar

Posted on 15:21 by Unknown
Today is a classic example of how the Internet can make wacky stories develop a life of their own.

Earlier in the day one of my friends re-tweeted a National Rail post that a lion had been spotted crossing a train line with a cub near Shepley near Huddersfield. No matter how unlikely this seems - if it does exist then it must have escaped from some sort of private zoo unless it's picked West Yorkshire as an unusual holiday destination - it's really come alive on the internet, covered by the BBC, The Guardian, The Belfast Telegraph, The Huffington Post, and many others you can find from a quick Google search.

But it doesn't stop there in the world of social networks. Already the lion is on Twitter (@shepley_lion) and there is even now a lion cuddly toy available for purchase on Amazon. Granted it's a standard toy with a PhotoShopped t-shirt print but still, I kid you not.

I'm off to bed now. If I don't wake up in the morning to find it has a Facebook fan page and a blog I'll be disappointed. And if it's not covered in the Sun with a headline like 'Lion spotted on the Mane-Line' or 'Leaves on the line? No lion on the line' I'll be upset.
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This Week's Single Releases: Bruno Mars, Maverick Sabre, Pixie Lott feat. Pusha T, Tinchy Stryder feat. Calvin Harris

Posted on 05:19 by Unknown
Taken from the soundtrack for the latest sparkly-sparkly-bitey-bitey-lovey-dovey Twilight vampire film 'Breaking Down' (is that a typo or what you do when you've seen it, not sure) is Bruno Mars' 'It Will Rain'. It's no 'Grenade' or 'Marry You' or 'The Lazy Song' but I'm sure it will sound great on the film as the leads look into each other's eyes as they declare their love for each other, or realise they've kissed and she's had garlic or whatever, due to its swelling strings, operatic orchestral bits or heartfelt lyrics. Sure, it's a sloppy by-numbers ballad, but it's a pleasant enough way to spend four minutes and it's a well put together song, just a little too much 'X Factor' for my liking. And it sort of ends like they weren't sure where to go next. 6/10

Having appeared as a guest artist on Professor Green's album, it's now time for Maverick Sabre to step into the spotlight with 'I Need'. With a voice that doesn't match his look at all, this is a smooth, slick single with a summery chorus that mixes Macy Gray with Cee-Lo Green. Yes, the bits after the chorus wander a little aimlessly but otherwise it's a cracking, laid back track that doesn't feel restricted by its musical structure, which is enjoyable in itself. A great listen and something a little different for the charts. Sit back, put it on and relax! 7/10

First cut from second album 'All About Tonight' was a great song and a deserving number one, and now Pixie Lott is back with her follow-up 'What Do You Take Me For?' which features rapper Pusha-T on support, kicking off the track ala 'Umbrella' with an introduction and the usual cliched staples of announcing the artists names. His introduction at the start is short and, unsurprisingly he returns later for some more in a slow, functional but lacklustre section. I usually enjoy songs that throw in a little bit of rapping but it's been done so many times before now and getting a little tired. Elsewhere, the musical backing is thick, heavy and basey and gets the thumbs up and the verses and chorus are powerful and is fun to listen to. Another top track from Pixie even if it's not as good as her previous hit with not as distinctive sections as the number one, and though the rap additions are interesting they're nothing we've not heard many times before. 6.5/10

Calvin Harris continues to carve a niche in producing for other artists. Having joined up with Kelis and Rihanna among others this time it's Tinchy Stryder with 'Off The Record', with a video that you expect to be sponsored by Barclaycard. If you've heard a Calvin Harris-produced track before then you'll immediately recognise this, as you could immediately start singing 'Dance Wiv Me' at times and Tinchy name-checks 'The Girls' at one point which just adds to the repetition. In essence it's a great club track but it's too similar to Calvin's previous work so sounds more like a mash-up than a fresh track. Tinchy does a great job on his vocals even if the lyrics let him down at times (yes, another reference to Las Vegas, gambling and being 'all in') but he's let down by a tired backing track. [5.5/10]
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Daley - Those Who Wait [Album Review]

Posted on 04:50 by Unknown
Way back in September I went to Bingley Music Live, as covered elsewhere on this blog, and saw a whole load of artists that I subsequently bought the CDs of and reviewed. One artist that I didn't get round to in that time was Daley, whose ten-track mix tape 'Those Who Wait' is available to download - for free - by anyone from www.daley.tv. And I did, and now I've listened to it, and here is what I think!

The album opens with 'Those Who Wait', which is a low key opening for an album but includes thet touching, thoughtful lyrics that dominate the album. This opener benefits from a laid back, chilled beat and sees Daley doing an impersonation of the style of Savage Garden's Darren Hayes, which is no bad thing.

Follower 'Let It Go sees Daley channelling Michael Jackson when he was good (and, of course, alive) with a blend of Justin Timberlake thrown in, though as that latter singer has built a career doing Jacko impersonations, it's not a surprise. The song benefits from a well constructed chorus even if he descends into Mariah Carey-style wailing at times, but not to such a level that it detracts from the overall tune.

Third track 'Game Over' continues the theme of lyrics on love, delivered in a floaty style with RnB undertones, a style that is used on most of the tracks here to good effect, including on fourth 'Alone Together' featuring Marsha Ambrosius. The song sounds very much in the style of black RnB stars such as R Kelly, even though Daley's as opposite R Kelly as you could imagine with a pale face and large ginger quiff.

'Love Lost' is a stripped back short interlude with just a chorus backing, allowing you to focus on the lyrics, and shows off the quality of recording, especially good when you consider he's allowing you to listen to this album for zilch. There's no evidence of bedroom recording here but, if it was done between his bed and wardrobe, I want his studio! The only negative about the tracks so far is that they all sound very similar, with not much change in style between tracks.

'Smoking Gun' follows after the interlude and refreshingly sees a change in style with a more exciting drum riff, creating the best track on the album that could easily be single material, with some excellent choir effects that lift it to an operatic ending that Meat Loaf would be proud of.

Up next is 'Spent' and it starts with a police siren rattling through a city, but leads into a pondering piano-led ballad that doesn't really get anywhere but the lyrics are once more well written and the mix of lead and backing vocals work well.

We then get into what are, effectively, the bonus tracks of the album, starting with an acoustic version of 'Pretty Wings' which is nice but nothing remarkable.

It's the 'Harry Love Remix' of his collaboration with Gorillaz 'Doncamatic' that follows which, naturally due to the work together, is the most fleshed out track and smartly produced and, though not as good as some other Gorillaz tracks, it's one of the better ones from the 'Plastic Beach' era with a catchy chorus and interesting beat and synth work, and it's a shame it wasn't on the full-release of the album originally to beef up a sub-par album, but that's a conversation about their poor third release for another time.

The album comes to an end with an acoustic version of Madonna's 'Like A Virgin', stripped back and slower, and an interesting version of it, almost lounge-like, and much more chilled out than the original. It's a very good version of it.

Overall you can't really complain about an album that is free but what I can say is that, instead of getting some chap in his bedroom recording a series of OK tracks, this could easily be a charged-for release and, though you could accuse him of not wandering away from a winning style for much of the ten-track album there is certainly much to enjoy in 'Smoking Gun', 'Doncamatic' and 'Let It Go', among others, and I've paid for worse sounding, less enjoyable albums.

Download it now!

7/10
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Thursday, 3 November 2011

Is Apple iTunes really a vampire?

Posted on 09:22 by Unknown
...well it sucks...

OK, that's a cheap joke, but was Pete Townsend right when he called Apple as a vampire? (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-15528101)

Like any retailer we can't really expect Apple to support unsigned artists, as much as we wouldn't expect HMV or WHSmith to do so. In fact, and this is a lot from someone who doesn't particularly like Apple, they do a lot for smaller artists with their podcast service and such like.

But I do completely agree with his thoughts on illegal downloaders with that metaphor. Yes, I know there are people who download music to see if they like it before buying it, but for everyone like that there are loads that use it as subsititute for putting their hand in their pocket.
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It's time once more to battle with charity symbolism....

Posted on 09:18 by Unknown
It’s that time again when I play the eternal battle that faces most people each year. You want to support the cause but in doing so leads you to two weeks of a continuous fight with your clothing, a pin, your conscience and your over garments.

Yes; I’m talking about the humble poppy.

Now, I support the reasons behind wearing a poppy and am happy to wear mine with pride. I don’t write into ‘Points of View’ to deride news readers and every presenter from Countryfile to Balamory (is that still on?) wearing them on TV from mid-July, or however early it is they wear them these days; I don’t particularly support the wars we might be involved in but want to support our soldiers both past and present; and I don’t mind wearing the red one over a “white” poppy. But what I don’t enjoy is the total faff that wearing a poppy brings.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not going to make out that wearing a poppy is a real trial, as if doing so is really difficult like nuclear fusion, building a space rocket or trying to work out just how Nicki Minaj comes up with the lyrics to her song. It’s just an annual annoyance that really gets my goat.

Let’s start by trying to find a poppy. Now, where I work at the University of Bradford, you can rely on them having them at main reception, where I picked up my first (notice the word first, and remember it). But elsewhere it’s tricky to find them. As I wandered through town there was no one selling them in the street, weird considering you usually have to bat away charity sellers down the main street like the pilot in film ‘Airplane!’, and there were none on sale in Morrisons, which is weird considering you can already buy Christmas crackers and puddings seven weeks ahead of time but nothing for, like, eight days away. It’s almost like you have to hunt them down to find them, and surely it shouldn’t be like that?

Secondly, once you’ve found a poppy and purchased one, the struggle then begins to keep it on your clothes. For reasons unknown to me, each year they insist on selling the poppy in two-parts, like a really boring Kinder toy: the poppy, and a pin. Now, when you buy an AIDS or cancer ribbon, or get a badge free in your favourite magazine, they’ve invented the technology of the safety pin that is, you know, attached to the thing. You open the pin, slip it through your clothes and, voila, it’s attached to your outfit and only a very heavy wind, a Tom and Jerry-style magnet, or Chuck Norris is going to remove it. But, for some reason the Royal Legion think that a pin is ample to allow you to keep hold of your poppy for a week.

And herein lies the flaw. From my experience it’s fine if you always wear nice linen shirts which the pin stays in pretty happily. But if you wear a t-shirt or, heaven forbid, something woollen or bobbly, you might as well just buy your poppy and chuck it immediately on the floor as if you don’t really like it.

Even a small blob of your favourite brand of blu-tac style adhesive on the end fails to provide a permanent solution as that soon shuffles its way off the end of the pin and falls to the floor, only to be followed by the poppy in some sort of weird clothing suicide pact.

You can spend five minutes carefully pushing the pin through your top, ensuring you don’t snag too much fabric so there’s plenty of pin-end left to compensate for the movement of your clothing, and still within half a day the pin will have wriggled free, allowing your poppy to make its escape on the floor somewhere, meaning you have to spend the whole day re-tracing your steps to find it like some sort of sub-par orienteering day trip; add the pin to your collection of them; or buy a new one.

Not that I’m against paying another pound for a new poppy – it goes to a good cause after all – but I’d rather spend extra and buy one where the poppy actually comes with a safety pin attached.

Now for the past couple of years I have been in the possession of an enamel poppy badge which does come with an attached pin but even this has its flaws. Firstly, it’s smaller than the usual poppy so it doesn’t really show the support as much; secondly, as I have done, you put it somewhere safe and lose it between each Remembrance Sunday, especially when you’ve moved twice in twelve months as I have. And, if you want to buy a new one, good luck. They’re rarer than the ordinary poppies.

So, that leaves you with Hobson’s choice of sticking with the traditional poppy, the one that moves around more than the head of the caravan club as you, as etiquette and social standing dictates, change your clothes on a daily basis. One day it might be fine; the next, as you choose to wear a more flexible t-shirt, the poppy makes a bid for freedom.

One solution would be to stay in the same clothes for a fortnight, but that brings with it its own pitfalls. Like a lack of friends and people avoiding you. And stickiness.

If you are lucky enough to keep hold of your poppy then having one leads to an unfortunate tic. You know, as you sit at your desk, or in meetings, constantly fiddling with it to a) ensure it’s still there and not blowing away down the corridor; b) there’s enough pin-end left that it’s not going to wriggle to freedom; and c) it’s not curling up to form the poppy equivalent of those wrapped wafers you get in posh coffee shops. If people didn’t think you were eccentric before they will after you constantly look like you’re inspecting your left nipple all the time.

Somewhere I believe there is, next to the fridge mountain and wine lake, a pile of poppies a mile high, somewhere outside Glamorgan, where all the free poppies have blown off people’s tops, ready to be gathered up, dusted down and re-sold. I swear I saw it on Google Earth.

And, of course, in between losing your poppy and finding somewhere that actually sells them, you are poppy-less and thus feel like, even though this probably isn’t the case, everyone is looking at you disparagingly for not wearing a poppy.

For next year I’m going to get a t-shirt printed that has a large picture of a poppy on the front that says ‘I bought a poppy but the stupid pin is as much use as Gordon Ramsey at a Weight Watchers meeting for the easily offended’ and just donate a fiver to the cause instead.

In conclusion I agree with the cause behind poppies and I think people should wear them but I think they need to sort it out. A minimum of £2 in these times of inflation is not much to ask in exchange for a poppy that comes with its own attached safety pin, and having them available at more places. You can get cash back at Morrisons, why not poppy back (and sexy back if they have time, but that’s for another discussion…)?

I’m not against giving them more than a quid; after all I must buy about five poppies per season, when a season is only two weeks. It’s like Man United replacing their striker every match throughout their season because they fall off the terraces and disappear, only left with a small metallic souvenir. You wouldn’t expect to purchase half a dozen pumpkins in the run up to Hallowe’en or replace your Christmas tree every week as it doesn’t stay up. So why should we put up with it in the run up to Remembrance Sunday.

[You can, of course, keep replacing eggs at Easter. Yum.]

I can walk into any pub round here and purchase from a vending machine tampons, condoms, inflatable sheep and god knows what else that you can get for £2.00. Why not poppies? Or at least gaffer tape to affix it to your chest like some sort of bomb.

I want to wear a poppy with pride but at the moment the poppy appeal is not that appealing. I can’t support it well if every time I change my top, move or sneeze I have to re-align it, ensure it’s still on and fiddle with it like I’ve got OCD and demand it be perpendicular to my beard.

Sort it out somebody. Else I’ll be buying one of those sticky ones you get for cars and attaching it to my chest, looking like some floral version of Iron Man.

Or maybe just an idiot.

Phil bought his first poppy on October 27th and it stayed with him for four days. He’s currently on the hunt to purchase his second. So don’t judge him for not wearing one, OK!
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Wednesday, 2 November 2011

Doctor Who - Let's Do It!

Posted on 17:28 by Unknown
For those of you who love Doctor Who and Victoria Wood...

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